An Open Letter to the Bankers of America…
(Not to be confused or in any way referring to Bank of America, of course.)
My deepest condolences on your recent loss. I know how much Dee Regulation meant to you, and I know that this is, indeed, a difficult time for you, as it is for us all. Try to think of the good times you shared…the lavish parties, extravagent perks, and generous–albeit relatively high–salaries. Remember that you are not alone in your grief. You have many friends around you who suffered loss recently as well and understand how you feel. Why it seems like only yesterday (although I’m sure it was in 2008) when even I felt the stinging pain that comes with a loss this great. My loss was my little house in the country, but I know our feelings must be similar. To lose something important to you, no matter how big or small, is still a trial. I know you will recover quickly with a support system such as you have. Already, members of the Republic party are at your side, trying to cheer you up, shielding you from the outside world, comforting you as you regain your composure. The other taxpayers and I hope you received the gift we sent. It’s not much, but it’s all we could afford, and I’m sure those TARP funds are coming in handy in your hour of need. I know things will get better for you.
Sincerely,
Polythene Ham
